She Uses Vaseline…

I friggin’ love Vaseline. I keep tubs of it all around, especially in my night stand. If you’re already thinking about teenage masturbation jokes, save it; my boyfriend has beaten you to that one a hundred times over.

Seriously though, there is a lot of magic going on in that gooey tub. Here are some of my favorite things you can do with it:

  • Got dry skin? Vaseline has an app for that. Rub it in to your cuticles to avoid hangnails. Rub it into your elbows to avoid elephant skin. Rub it anywhere you have recently shaved– this also helps prevent ingrown hairs!
  • Extend your pedicure by coating your feet in it, then slipping on some socks for at least 30 minutes. The more often you do it, the less you’ll need that callus remover that they always charge you $5 for.
  • Dab a q-tip into it and use it as a make-up eraser
  • Apply it underneath eye shadow or on the apples of your cheeks for a glowy, dewy look
  • Use it as a nightly eye cream. Legend has it that it helps your lashes grow longer. I can’t confirm this, but I can confirm that it works just as well for me as expensive eye creams and keeping the area around my eyes soft.
  • Rub some on older shoes or a handbag to make them look brand new
  • You can use it on the ends of your hair to hide split ends, or in place of hair wax/goop/product to create a choppy or piece-y look if you’re going for that
  • It makes one of the best lip balms, especially when your lips are already chapped. Or rub some on, then scrub your lips with a toothbrush to exfoliate.
  • I recently learned that if you apply it to the skin before applying perfume, it makes the perfume last longer (!)
  • Puff up from eating too much salt and can’t get a ring off? Vaseline will help that bad boy slip right off.
Those are mostly beauty-related, but you can also do things like keep your jack-o-lantern from rotting so quickly, for getting gum off the bottom of a table, and keeping your car battery from corroding. 
Not gonna, lie, I learned those last three from googling it. But seriously, Vaseline is one of my favorite things for good reason. 
And in case I got the Flaming Lips song stuck in your head, here you go:
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